Day Twenty Six: Growing Through Temptation

What did you read today that was helpful or convicting?

I'm not used to thinking about temptations as an opportunity to do good! But, as I worked my way through the chapter, I was encouraged: "temptation simply provides a choice."

Temptation isn't really a word that gets used a lot anymore. Probably because the word "sin" doesn't get used much anymore. Sin is a good generic word to describe all the wrong behavior that we do, in the eyes of God, of others, and ourselves.

Sin can be small, it can be catastrophic; it can be thoughtless, it can be malicious. And the temptation to sin can be obvious, but we can also be oblivious. But to grow through our temptations, that requires self-reflection and the power to choose.

I see how the power of sin in my life wreaks havoc, and I continue to be reminded of the power of temptation. I often give in before I even realize what just happened. But even then I have a choice: do I repent or do I relent.

And then what - do I pray and ask for help, do I seek help in order to succeed next time? Or do I just accept the failure and merely resent the consequences? This is where having good friends who will care and speak truth into your life can be such an anchor when the strong currents of temptation come swirling through.

This was encouraging:

While temptation is Satan's primary weapon to destroy you, God wants to use it to develop you. Every time you choose to do good instead of sin, you are growing in the character of Christ. To understand this, you must first identify the qualities of Jesus. 

One of the most concise descriptions of his character is the fruit of the Spirit: "When the Holy Spirit controls our lives, he will produce this kind of fruit in us: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control." These nine qualities are an expansion of the Great Commandment and portray a beautiful description of Jesus Christ.  To have the fruit of the Spirit is to be like Christ.

God develops the fruit of the Spirit in your life by allowing you to experience circumstances in which you're tempted to express the exact opposite quality! Character development always involves a choice, and temptation provides that opportunity. 

God uses the opposite situation of each fruit to allow us a choice. You can't claim to be good if you've never had the opportunity to be unfaithful. Every time you defeat a temptation, you become more like Jesus!

Here's a helpful thought on how temptations affect us:

We think temptation lies around us, but God says it begins within us. If you didn't have the internal desire, the temptation could not attract you. Temptation always starts in your mind, not in circumstances. Jesus said, "For from within, out of a person's heart, come evil thoughts, sexual immorality, theft, murder, adultery, greed, wickedness, deceit, eagerness for lustful pleasure, envy, slander, pride, and foolishness. All these vile things come from within."

Temptation preys upon our doubts, and it gains power through deception. We indulge in the temptation because we choose to believe that a pleasurable or desirable outcome is pretty much guaranteed. But temptations always distort reality, and they blind us to the true consequences. How many times do we regret a decision that ultimately was rooted in a temptation? If only we could have seen what would happen!

This is why listening to the Holy Spirit is so crucial - we need the prompt in our conscience to resist the temptation, to get an outside power to help us. The Holy Spirit can also help us recognize habits and patterns we get into that set us up for failure when it comes to temptations.

Ask yourself, "When am I most tempted? What day of the week? What time of day?" Ask, "Where am I most tempted? At work? At home? At a neighbor's house? At a sports bar? In an airport or motel out of town?" 

Ask, "Who is with me when I"m most tempted? Friends? Coworkers? A crowd of strangers? When I'm alone?" Also ask, "How do I actually feel when I am most tempted?" It may be when you are tired or lonely or bored or depressed or under stress. It may be when you've been hurt or angry or worried, or after a big success or spiritual high. 

You should identify your typical pattern of temptation and then prepare to avoid those situations as much as possible.

It's remarkable that God is so committed to helping us overcome temptations, learn from our temptations, and bring good through our failures with temptations. God's love for us is not lessened through being tempted or giving in to them. Often times this is when we begin to realize how much God really does love us!

The Bible guarantees that our cry for help will be heard because Jesus is sympathetic to our struggle. He faced the same temptations we do. He, "understands our weakness, for he faced all of the same temptations we do, yet he did not sin."

...God never gets irritated, bored, or impatient when we keep coming back to him. The Bible says, "Let us have confidence, then, and approach God's throne, where there is grace. There we will receive mercy and find grace to help us just when we need it."

What are the temptations that are infecting your life? What's the character traits that God is focusing on these days? What must you do different in order to grow through these temptations to become more like Jesus?

Day Twenty Five: Transformed by Trouble

What did you read today that was encouraging or convicting?

This is probably one of the most popular chapters in the book. Everybody has problems, and everybody knows people who have even more problems. At some point you wonder where God is in all of these troubles, and if good can come out of it. We all have an interest in knowing how God works to transform us through our troubles.

Here's the one paragraph that really hit home for me:

Every problem is a character-building opportunity, and the more difficult it is, the greater the potential for building spiritual muscle and moral fiber. Paul said, "We know that these troubles produce patience. And patience produces character."

I read that and remembered a bunch of tough stuff that's been going on in my life lately, stuff that has basically required a lot of patience from me. Instead of patient I could have been mouthy, or meddling, or mad, or start meandering down a different path. But I hung in there, and in some instances, the troubles have given way to a better scenario. Other situations, though, seem to require even more patience than I'm currently giving. And what does all this patience do for me? It's the primary definition of love, and it's a key component of character-building.

Enduring trouble is not the same as accepting bad behavior or ignoring evil actions. Enduring trouble is more about not giving up on doing good, persevering is pro-actively doing the next right thing in the face of resistance, patience is about not giving up on God prevailing. This is how to face trouble and build character: be patient.

This is good:

Since God intends to make you like Jesus, he will take you through the same experiences Jesus went through. That includes lonliness, temptation, stress, criticism, rejection, and many other problems. The Bible says Jesus "learned obedience through suffering" and "was made perfect through suffering." Why would God exempt us from what he allowed his own Son to experience? Paul said, "We go through exactly what Christ goes through. If we go through the hard times with him, then we're certainly going to go through the good times with him!"

Here's a few more lines that I needed to read:

Life is a series of problems. Every time you solve one, another is waiting to take its place. Not all of them are big, but all are significant in God's growth process for you.

We learn things about God in suffering that we can't learn any other way.

Problems force us to look to God and depend on him instead of ourselves.

Corrie Ten Boom, who suffered in a Nazi death camp, explained the power of focus: "If you look at the world, you'll be distressed. If you look within, you'll be depressed. But if you look at Christ, you'll be at rest!" Your focus will determine your feelings.

If you are facing trouble right now, don't ask, "Why me?" Instead ask, "What do you want me to learn?" Then trust God and keep on doing what's right.

Don't give up - grow up!

Day Twenty Four: Transformed by Truth

What did you read that was interesting, convicting, or encouraging today?

"If you continue in my word, then you are my disciples indeed; and you shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free." There is no substitute for reading the Scriptures. The inherent power in the Words of God to change our lives is untapped for so many of us because we simply never choose to read the Bible on a regular basis.

There are so many things to read these days, it takes a real effort to keep on saying "no" to great books, fascinating magazines, compelling internet newsites, and on and on and on. For those of you who don't like to read, I guess you have the problem of turning off the radio or TV or YouTube. Or you are too busy, or tired, or overwhelmed. Yet, if we believe that we can be transformed by the truth, why do we not immerse ourselves in the Scriptures more?

Maybe it's because we know Christians who know the Bible really well, but they are still morons - morons who are still petty, shallow, unchanged, and prideful. It's unfortunate that people like that spout out their Bible knowledge. I beg you: don't let those people sway you away from investing time in the Bible and absorbing God's Word into your life. You want change, you want wisdom, you want help, you want God... and this is what you'll get if this is what you want from reading and reflecting on the Scriptures.

Here's some quotes I liked from the chapter today:

Spiritual growth is the process of replacing lies with truth.

The Bible is far more than a doctrinal guidebook. God's Word generates life, creates faith, produces change, frightens the Devil, causes miracles, heals hurts, builds character, transforms circumstances, imparts joy, overcomes adversity, defeats temptation, infuses hope, releases power, cleanses our minds, brings things into being, and guarantees our future forever!

The Bible must become the authoritative standard for my life: the compass I rely on for direction, the counsel I listen to for making wise decisions, and the benchmark I use for evaluating everything.

It is not enough just to believe the Bible; I must fill my mind with it so that the Holy Spirit can transform me with the truth. There are five ways to do this: you can receive it, read it, research it, remember it, and reflect on it.

Anytime you fell you are not learning anything from a sermon or a Bible teacher, you should check your attitude, especially for pride, because God can speak through even the most boring teacher when you are humble and receptive. James advises, "In a humble spirit, receive and welcome the Word which implanted and rooted in your hearts contains the power to save your souls."

But if you will just read the Bible just fifteen minutes a day, you will read completely through it once a year.

The difference between reading and studying the Bible involves two additional activities: asking questions of the text and writing down your insights.

You remember what is important to you. If God's Word is important, you will take the time to remember it. The three keys to memorizing Scripture are review, review, and review! The Bible says, "Remember what Christ taught and let his words enrich your lives and make you wise."

No other habit can do more to transform your life and make you more lie Jesus than daily reflection on Scripture. As we take time to contemplate God's truth, seriously reflecting on the example of Christ, we are "transformed into his likeness with ever increasing glory." Serious reflection on God's truth is a key to answered prayer and the secret to successful living.

The best way to become a "doer of the Word" is to always write out an action step as a result of your reading or studying or reflecting on God's Word. Develop the habit of writing down exactly what you intend to do. This action step should be personal (involving you), practical (something you can do), and provable (with a deadline to do it). Every application will involve either your relationship with God, your relationship to others, or your personal character.

What has God already told you to do in his Word that you haven't started doing yet?

Day Twenty Three: How We Grow

What did you find helpful in the readings today?

An encouraging idea that came to me after I finished reading the chapter: anybody can grow up! I know people who have all sorts of backgrounds when it comes to education, career opportunities, family situations, health issues, and financial stability. Everything can be an excuse for immaturity, and everything can be a prompt to grow up. Nobody had a perfect life growing up, and yet everybody needs to do what it takes to grow up. And Jesus is the way.

We become what we are committed to.

Christlikeness is the result of making Christlike choices and depending on his Spirit to help you fulfill those choices.

To change your life, you must change the way you think. The Bible says, "Let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think." The way you think determines the way you feel, and the way you feel influences the way you act. Paul said, "There must be spiritual renewal of your thoughts and attitudes."

To be like Christ you must develop the mind of Christ. We are commanded to "think the same way that Christ Jesus thought."

This is where reading the Scriptures and stories of Jesus are so crucial: we learn what Jesus did so that we can know what Jesus wants us to do. And this is why the same Spirit that was in Jesus is available to us today: so we can think and do what Jesus did.

The Spirit of Jesus gives us power and energy to do the next right thing. The Spirit gives us direction and instruction about how to do the next right thing. The Spirit pricks our conscience and convicts our heart about what is right and wrong.

When we make it our goal to be like Christ, and we put in the effort as we rely on the Spirit, things will begin to change.

Day Twenty Two: Created to Become Like Christ

What helpful insights did you find in the reading today?

What would it look like if God became like one of us? It's a great question, and there's already a great answer out there for us to explore: Jesus. When we wonder what it's like to be made in the image of God, we look at Jesus. When we wonder what it means to be godly and good, we look at Jesus. The Bible says, "You were... created to be like God, truly righteous and holy." And Jesus helps us understand what that looks like in real life on this beautiful, frightening planet.

Here's some quotes from the chapter that were helpful to me:

God's ultimate goal for your life on earth is not comfort, but character development.

Christlikeness is all about transforming your character, not your personality.

Every time you forget that character is one of God's purposes for your life, you will become frustrated by your circumstances. ...life is supposed to be difficult! It's what enables us to grow.

God [is not] a genie who simply exists to serve you in your selfish pursuit of personal fulfillment. ...God is not your servant, and if you fall for the idea that life is supposed to be easy, either you will become severely disillusioned or you will live in denial of reality.

Mention "the power of the Holy Spirit," and many people think of miraculous demonstrations and intense emotions. But most of the time the Holy Spirit's power is released in your life in quiet, unassuming ways that you aren't even aware of or can't feel. He often nudges us with "a gentle whisper."

Christlikeness is not produced by imitation, but by inhabitation. We allow Christ to live through us. "For this is the secret: Christ lives in you." How does this happen in real life? Through the choices we make. We choose to do the right thing in situations and then trust God's Spirit to give us his power, love, faith, and wisdom to do it. Since God's Spirit lives inside of us, these things are always available for the asking.

Obedience unlocks God's power.

God waits for you to act first. Don't wait to feel powerful or confident. Move ahead in your weakness, doing the right thing in spite of your fears and feelings. This is how you cooperate with the Holy Spirit, and it is how your character develops.

God uses people. He usually prefers to work through people rather than perform miracles, so that we will depend on each other for fellowship. He wants us to grow together.

Spiritual maturity is neither instant nor automatic; it is a gradual, progressive development that will take the rest of your life.

Much confusion in the Christian life comes from ignoring the simple truth that God is far more interested in building your character than anything else.

God is far more interested in what you are than in what you do. We are human beings, not human doings.

...many [Christians] have abandoned living for God's great purposes and settled for personal fulfillment and emotional stability. That is narcissism, not discipleship. Jesus did not die on the cross just so we could live comfortable, well-adjusted lives.

Day Twenty One: Protecting Your Church

What helpful insights did you find in the reading today?

I think everybody will agree that no church is perfect, and that everybody that goes to a church still sins. The problem seems to stem from those Christians and churches who act like they are "holier-than-thou" and look down on others who are different in their beliefs and behaviours. Or, there is a real problem with churches and Christians who can never admit when they are wrong, they never confess when they sin, and thus never see a need to apologize or ask for forgiveness.

So I suppose one way to protect your church is to become the kind of person who is able to admit when they are wrong, apologize, seek to make amends, and not be judgmental towards others who are different. When unacceptable behavior is unleashed within a church, there is a harsh way to deal with it, and a gentle way. Looking down on others who sin doesn't help change the situation; coming along side others who make mistakes and loving them is a better form of life-change.

I really liked these phrases from the chapter:

Focus on what we have in common, not our differences. Paul tells us, "Let us concentrate on the things which make for harmony, and on the growth of one another's character."

Be realistic in your expectations. Once you discover what God intends real fellowship to be, it is easy to become discouraged by the gap between the ideal and the real in your church. Yet we must passionately love the church in spite of its imperfections. Longing for the ideal while criticizing the real is evidence of immaturity. On the other hand, settling for the real without striving for the ideal is complacency. Maturity is living with the tension.

Bonhoeffer said, "He who loves his dream of community more than the Christian community itself becomes a destroyer of the latter... If we do not give thanks daily for the Christian fellowship in which we have been placed, even when there is no great experience, no discoverable riches, but much weakness, small faith, and difficulty; if on the contrary we keep complaining that everything is paltry and petty, then we hinder God from letting our fellowship grow."

Choose to encourage rather than criticize. It's the Devil's job to blame, complain, and criticize members of God's family. Anytime we do the same, we're being duped into doing Satan's work for him. The Bible says, "Let's agree to use all our energy in getting along with each other. Help others with encouraging words; don't drag them down by finding fault."

Refuse to listen to gossip. If you listen to gossip, God says you are a troublemaker. "Troublemakers listen to troublemakers."

Practice God's method of conflict resolution. Jesus gave the church a simple three-step process: "If a believer hurts you, go and tell him - work it out between the two of you. If he listens, you've made a friend. If he won't listen, take one or two others along so that the presence of witnesses will keep things honest, and try again. If he still won't listen, tell the church."

Support your pastor and leaders. The Bible is clear about how we are to relate to those who serve us: "Be responsive to your pastoral leaders. Listen to their counsel. They are alert to the condition of your lives and work under the strict supervision of God. Contribute to the joy of their leadership, not its drudgery. Why would you want to make things harder for them?" Pastors will one day stand before God and give an account of how well they watched over you.

What have you been doing to build up the unity and peace of the church? What do you need to start doing or stop doing to help our church become even more inviting to our friends, family, and neigbors?

Day Twenty: Restoring Broken Fellowship

What hit home for you in the reading today?

This was a very important chapter. Everybody has people in their life that they need to restore a relationship, or they have a friend that needs help restoring a relationship. It's always a great joy to help two people restore their relationship. Whether it is a husband and a wife, parents and their children, brothers and sisters, neighbors or coworkers, there is plenty that ruins relationships - and there is always a need to restore relationships.

Relationships are always worth restoring. Because life is all about learning how to love, God wants us to value relationships and make the effort to maintain them instead of discarding them whenever there is a rift, a hurt, or a conflict.

Peacemakers are rare because peacemaking is hard work.

So how do you help restore a relationship? Here are some very wise ideas on how to help your relationship move from strained to restored.

Talk to God before talking to the person.  All your relationships would go smoother if you would just pray more about them. Most conflict is rooted in unmet needs. Some of these can only be met by God. When you expect anyone - a friend, a spouse, a boss, or family member - to meet a need that only God can fulfill, you are setting yourself up for disappointment and bitterness. No one can meet all your needs except God.

Always take the initiative. It doesn't matter whether you are the offender or the offended: God expects you to make the first move.

Sympathize with their feelings. Use your ears more than your mouth. Before attempting to solve any disagreement you must first listen to people's feelings. Don't try to talk people out of how they feel at first. Just listen and let them unload emotionally without being defensive. It is a sacrifice to patiently absorb the anger of others, especially if it's unfounded.

Confess your part of the conflict. If you are serious about restoring a relationship, you should begin with admitting your own mistakes or sin. Jesus said it's the way to see things more clearly: "First get rid of the log from your own eye; then perhaps you will see well enough to deal with the speck in your friend's eye." Since we all have blind spots, you may need to ask a third party to help you evacuate your own actions before meeting with the person with whom you have a conflict. Also, ask God to show you how much of the problem is your fault.

Attack the problem, not the person. You cannot fix the problem if you're consumed with fixing the blame. You must choose between the two. The Bible says, "A gentle response defuses anger, but a sharp tongue kindles a temper-fire."

Cooperate as much as possible. Peace always has a price tag. Sometimes it costs us our pride; it often costs us our self-centeredness.

Emphasize reconciliation, not resolution. It is unrealistic to expect everyone to agree about everything. Reconciliation focuses on the relationship, while resolution focuses on the problem. When we focus on reconciliation, the problem loses significance and often becomes irrelevant.

"Work hard at living in peace with others."

Day Nineteen: Cultivating Community

What hit home for you in the reading today?

With all the different types of people who are becoming part of Anchor, the thought comes to me: what can I do to help everyone contribute to the vitality of our community. With all the differences comes many opportunities for others to get annoyed, offended, misunderstood, irritated, etc. But with all the differences comes a great opportunity to dig deep and learn how to love and make a real contribution to community.

This whole chapter was very good, so much to quote, and so much for me to chew on and live out.

"You are joined together with peace through the Spirit, so make every effort to continue together in this way." It takes both God's power and our effort to produce a loving Christian community.

Most people have no one in their lives who loves them enough to tell them the truth (even when it's painful), so they continue in self-destructive ways.

The Bible tells us to "speak the truth in love" because we can't have community without candor.

Real fellowship, whether in a marriage, a friendship, or your church, depends on frankness. In fact, the tunnel of conflict is the passageway to intimacy in any relationship. Until you care enough to confront and resolve the underlying barriers, you will never grow close to each other.

Pride blocks God's grace in our lives, which we must have in order to grow, change, heal, and help others. We receive grace by humbly admitting that we need it. The Bible says anytime we are prideful, we are living in opposition to God!

You can develop humility in very practical ways: by admitting your weaknesses, by being patient with others' weaknesses, by being open to correction, and by pointing the spotlight on others. Paul advised, "Live in harmony with each other. Don't try to act important, but enjoy the company of ordinary people. And don't think you know it all!"

Courtesy is respecting our differences, being considerate of each other's feelings, and being patient with people who irritate us.

In [your life] and in every church there is always at least one "difficult" person, usually more than one. These difficult people may have special emotional needs, deep insecurities, irritating mannerisms, or poor social skills. You might call them EGR people - "Extra Grace Required." God put these people in our midst for both their benefit and ours.

One key to courtesy is understanding where people come from. Discover their history. When you know what they've been through, you will be more understanding. Instead of thinking about how far they still have to go, think about how far they have come in spite of their hurts.

Another part of courtesy is not downplaying other people's doubts. Just because you don't fear something doesn't make it an invalid feeling.

Life is about relationships - become successful in relationships and you are considered successful in life. Success with relationships is based on the many different kinds of people you can relate to, and how well you can be humble and courteous to them. What good is a church if it is able to attract lots of people, but all those people aren't any better at becoming successful in relationships with a wide variety of people? What good is a church if it stays small and gets real close to each other, but they never succeed in relating to all the different people in their neighborhood?

How about for you? How much more humility and more courtesy do you need to infuse into your relationships with more people? 

Day Eighteen: Experiencing Life Together

What hit home for you in the reading today?

Lots of great stuff in this chapter. I really liked this description about fellowship: experiencing authenticity, mutuality, sympathy, and mercy. As more and more people become part of a local congregation, it's important that more and more people take the initiative to build at least one or two friendships with others. A church ought to work hard to make it easy for people to meet each other, get to know each other, to build fellowship with a few other people.

Fellowship doesn't mean cliques. Cliques exist to protect you from undesirable people, they exist to fuel your false-sense of superiority. Fellowship is about love, about acceptance, about life together. But, the reality is that a small group of people can only have a limited amount of people in it, otherwise it isn't small anymore. It's really about the attitude going into it: is it about me and what I can get out of it, or what can I give to it?

There are lots of ways that fellowship can happen in a church: small groups is the most famous way, although it's not always the most practical way. Fellowship happens best when a few people make a point to get together on their own. Whether it's a once a week thing, once a month thing, or however they set it up. But for members of a church, there is the fellowship that happens on a Sunday morning, and then that helps fuel the kind of fellowship you can have later on in the week. Worship is where you meet people, Fellowship is where you get to really know people. 

I can't stress this enough: people must take the initiative to get to know other people. If you want to have a friend, be a friend. Don't wait for others to "let you in" to their group. Begin the looking for ways to be a friend, and allow the Spirit to guide that search along. If you want fellowship, you have to be willing to give fellowship, to make time and energy for fellowship. Don't wait for a church to start a fellowship program.

Fellowship doesn't always have to be deep, intense times of sharing the secrets of your life. Those moments can be important, but to get there, there has to be plenty of moments of fun, of serving together, of playing together, of working together on projects. So, when a church offers a work day, or a potluck dinner, or a movie night, or neighborhood clean-up day, or Lenten services with other churches, or ministry opportunities on a Sunday morning, or a Bible study, or softball games, or mission trips, or fundraiser events, or etc: these are all opportunities for building fellowship, for getting to know others, for building friendships.

"Share each other's troubles and problems, and in this way obey the law of Christ." Galatians 6:2 (NLT)

What have been some fellowship events that have been a good experience for you?

Day Seventeen: A Place to Belong

What hit home for you in the reading today?

Being a pastor, I get to hear both sides of the story, of why some Christians do want to be part of a church and why other Christians don't. Obviously I'm delighted to see more people become part of a local church. It's also intriguing to learn why other Christians stay away. When I have conversations with them, they usually put the burden on me to explain why the OUGHT to be involved in a church. Fair enough, although I think the burden on proof is also on them.

How can someone think of themselves as a Christian and yet refuse to be part of a local congregation? Plenty of Christians have made intentional choices not to return to a church for worship. Why?

I suppose the consumer mentality of our culture helps fuel the attitude of some Christians: they value a church like they value a good bargain. They end up being "satisfaction guaranteed" oriented instead of servant-hearted oriented.  Or something better to do on Sunday mornings appeared on their radar: sleeping in and having a relaxing morning, a long walk or a round of golf, family breakfasts and bike rides, etc. Or they were part of a congregation that was boring, irrelevant, petty, small-minded, judgmental, cliquish, and stingy.

Local congregations can make it harder for people to stay involved if they assume that people ought to stick around no matter what. A church is made of real people, a church is made up of a myriad of relationships. Relationships take a lot of work, especially when dealing with real, normal people who aren't your family or your first round of friends. If a church doesn't make love its first priority when it comes to attitude and actions, the relationship side of  it will become burdensome and unrewarding.

Every local congregation is a little different, not everyone will feel like they fit in. But churches ought to make it a point to be diverse in their community - if everyone looks like each other, you'll undermine the vibrancy of the relationships. This is true for suburban churches and urban churches, for small churches and large churches, for mainline churches and evangelical churches, for old churches and new churches.

Why become part of a church? 
1) learn to love God and others amongst real people with a similar heart.

2) become part of a community that is accepting - not based on your resume, your appearance, your skills/talents, your background, your health, your wealth, your interests, your accomplishments, your sins, your failures, your mistakes, your addictions, your past; but accepting of you because of love, because of God's love for you, because of God's love for us expressed in hospitality and welcome to you.

3) become part of a community of people who can accomplish more good together than on their own - the love of many is more powerful than the love of one. By caring for each other and our neighbors, we get to benefit from the many helping hands of a church instead of struggling forward all by yourself.

4) As a Christian, you didn't become one all by yourself, and you can't stay one all by yourself. Christ used many people to help you trust him, and you need people to help you keep trusting and following him. In fact, you can't follow him alone, you are to follow him with others.

Those are my four best reasons. What would yours be?

Day Sixteen: What Matters Most

What hit home for you in the reading today?

Here's some of the thoughts that I needed to re-read:

Life is all about love.

Life without love is really worthless. Paul makes this point: "No matter what I say, what I believe, and what I do, I'm bankrupt without love." Often we act as if relationships are something to be squeezed into our schedule. We talk about finding time for our children or making time for people in our lives. That gives the impression that relationships are just a part of our lives along with many other tasks. But God says relationships are what life is all about.

Relationships, not achievements or the acquisition of things, are what matters most in life. So why do we allow our relationships to get the short end of the stick? When our schedules become overloaded, we start skimming relationally, cutting back on giving the time, energy, and attention that loving relationships require. What's most important to God is displaced by what's urgent.

Busyness is a great enemy of relationships. We become preoccupied with making a living, doing our work, paying bills, and accomplishing goals as if these tasks are the point of life. They are not. The point of life is learning to love - God and people. Life minus love equals zero.

Love will last forever. Another reason God tells us to make love our top priority is that it is eternal: "These three things continue forever: faith, hope, and love. And the greatest of these is love." Love leaves a legacy. 

It is not enough just to say relationships are important; we must prove it by investing in them. Words alone are worthless. "My children, our love should not be just words and talk; it must be true love, which shows itself in action." Relationships take time and effort, and the best way to spell love is T-I-M-E.

The essence of love is not what we think or do or provide for others, but how much we give of ourselves. Men, in particular, often don't understand this. Many have said to me, "I don't understand my wife and kids. I provide everything they need. What more could they want?" They want you! Your eyes, your ears, your time, your attention, your presence, your focus - your time. Nothing can take the place of that.

Why is now the best time to express love? Because you don't know how long you will have the opportunity. Circumstances change. People die. Children grow up. You have no guarantee of tomorrow. If you want to express love, you had better do it now.

The best use of life is love. The best expression of love is time. The best time to love is now.

What about you? What did you read that was convicting or inspiring to you?

Day Fifteen: Formed for God's Family

What hit home for you in the reading today?

I needed the reminder that God is love and he treasures relationships. This also prompts to consider what kind of father God is to me. This then causes me to re-evaluate what kind of father I am to my children. Am I a father of love, do I treasure my relationships with my children? What would I point to as proof? Fortunately I think there is plenty of proof that I'm a good dad, and there's plenty of proof that God is a good Father.

There is a difference though: I'm a seen and present dad to my four kids running around my house; God is an unseen yet present father to children milling about the earth. Because we can't see God, it can be easy for us to discount the kind of fatherly influence he can have on us. God as our father can influence us in many ways, if we let him. The yearning is there to see God, and that day will come - in the meantime, we let him be a father to us, teaching us how to grow up and love.

It's vital to know and understand the role of Jesus Christ when it comes to our relationship to God. In order for us to enjoy God as our Father, we must hear the words of Jesus - he is our only way of knowing what God is like and what god wants from us. To know God as our father, we must accept what Jesus reveals to us as truth, as reality, as the best way forward. If you want to know what God our Father is really like, absorb the story of Jesus and his relationship with God as his Father.

Every human being was created by God, but not everyone is a child of God. The only way to get into God's family is by being born again into it. You became part of the human family by your first birth, but you become a member of God's family by your second birth. God "has given us the privilege of being born again, so that we are now members of God's own family."

The invitation to be part of God's family is universal, but there is one condition: faith in Jesus. The Bible says, "You are all children of God through faith in Christ Jesus."

Whatever your relationship on earth is like with your dad, we must "start over" with our relationship with God as our Father. Every dad on earth wounds his children, no dad is perfect. But God our Father always gets it right, and Jesus helps us to begin to understand what this new relationship can be like on earth and for eternity. Let Jesus teach you how to enjoy your relationship as a son or daughter of God. And then let God our Father help you forgive and love your dad, let God as your Father teach you how to love and lead others, let God the Father be with and influence you even when you can't see him.

Day Fourteen: When God Seems Distant

What hit home for you in the reading today?

This is probably the most common sentiment people have towards God: He seems to be far away. Most people admit that they've never heard God speak to them, they can count on one hand how many times they've "felt" God, and they're not sure if God's ever answered any of their prayers (especially the really important ones...). For a lot of us, God always seems distant. How do you worship a God that feels so far away?

St. John of the Cross referred to these days of spiritual dryness, doubt, and estrangement from God as "the dark night of the soul."

Several times I've had my "dark night of the soul". Times when not only does God not seem close, he seems to have purposefully withdrawn himself completely. Have you ever had that? What did you do?

Mother Teresa confessed in her diaries (which were published after her death) that for most of her ministry to the poor and dying of Calcutta, she NEVER felt God's presence, that God felt very far away. Yet she loved, inspired by God's love for her and others through the life of Jesus. She kept trusting God, though she didn't feel his presence. She kept faith in a God who felt far away. Her work amongst the rejected of Calcutta is amazing, and so is her faith. I think of Mother Teresa often...

The heart of worship is trust, and trust is not a feeling, but a choice. Do I trust when I feel like it? Do I trust because I choose it, no matter how I feel? Will I believe God even when I don't feel like it? I suppose you could say that our worship of God is more genuine when we trust him even though we don't feel like it. I'm sure God smiles big when we worship when we want to, but I'm also sure that God is honored when we worship even though we don't feel like it.

This feeling thing is a big deal - many of us only make decisions based on how we feel. We "choose" based on how we feel about a situation. Choosing always factors in feelings, but choosing wisely is not dependent on feelings. Wisdom and worship do the next right thing no matter how you feel about it. How about you - how much do your feelings direct your decisions? Really?

It's fine to want to feel close to God, nothing wrong with that desire. But don't make that desire more important than maturity. Wise, mature women and men choose to trust God and follow Jesus based on their understanding of reality, of truth, of life, of love - not based on how they feel about God and Jesus. Does that make sense?

"For God has said, 'I will never leave you; I will never abandon you.'"  Some things have to be believed before they can be seen.

What about you? What was helpful to you in the readings today?

Day Thirteen: Worship That Pleases God

What hit home for you in the reading today?

Worship can get pretty stale. Boring worship, lifeless worship, meaningless worship is what keeps people away from church on Sundays. Worship becomes an entertainment commodity - we judge based on the value it adds to our life. We like it based on how it makes us feel. But that's not really the point of worship, is it?

When Christians gather on a Sunday to worship God, all that really matters is the attitude of the heart of those believers. When they come together to sing and pray and listen and share and connect and serve and love, are they doing it for what they can get out of it, or as an expression of their worship to God? God is pleased when we worship him - not for what we can get out of it, but for what we can give him.

If you're at a stage in life where you're turned off by churches and their worship, you may want to check your motives: is worship about you or about God? You may also want to find a church where their worship is pleasing to God. Some churches just go through the motions on a Sunday. That's not good either. The Bible says, "Let us be grateful and worship God in a way that will please him." This is what you want to do, and this is the kind of church you want to join - men, women, and children who love God and worship him with a smile.

A fascinating insight was on the different ways people are wired and how this shapes the way they worship God. "...Christians have used many different paths for 2,000 years to [worship] God: being outdoors, studying, singing, reading, dancing, creating art, serving others, having solitude, enjoying fellowship, and participating in dozens of others activities."

I'm going to list the nine most common pathways of worship as described in the reading for today, as well as from Sacred Pathways by Gary Thomas. Read through the descriptions and take note of which two, three or four seem to be most like you. Let that inform you about how and where you "best" connect with God. I find the list to be very helpful.

Naturalists are most inspired to love God out-of-doors, in natural settings.

Sensates love God with their senses and appreciate beautiful worship services that involve their sight, taste, smell, and touch, not just their ears.

Traditionalists draw closer to God through rituals, liturgies, symbols, and unchanging structures.

Ascetics prefer to love God in solitude and simplicity.

Activists love God through confronting evil, battling injustice, and working to make the world a better place.

Caregivers love God by loving others and meeting their needs.

Enthusiasts love God through celebration.

Contemplatives love God through [mediation].

Intellectuals love God by studying with their minds.

Which ones best describe you? 

Which ones does Anchor help you do? Meaning: as you participate in the life of Anchor - not just on Sundays - are there some pathways that Anchor tends to "offer" more than others?

Is this list helpful? Does it give you permission to explore some refreshing ways of worshipping God? 

Day Twelve: Developing Your Friendship with God

What hit home for you in the reading today?

It's often too easy to forget or underestimate the power of our choices. We make a choice, and fail to appreciate what the resulting consequences could be. We waffle on making choices and miss opportunities that may not come back...for awhile. We also sometimes don't realize that we have the ability to choose in more situations than we do. So it is with our relationship with God: You are as close to God as you choose to be.

Are you mad at God? That's a choice you made. Are you disappointed with God? Again, that's a choice. Are you apathetic towards God? Are you uninterested in God? Are you frustrated by God? All choices you make on a regular basis. Wait wait, you tell me: those aren't choices! That's how you feel because of what has happened to you. No, no, I tell you: things happened and you chose to feel a certain way about it. 

Just because you feel a certain way towards something doesn't justify your choice. Things happen in life, and you can either choose to blame God because of how you feel, or you can choose to get more knowledge and understanding despite your feelings of doubt and frustration. Feeling angry or resentful or bitter towards God doesn't have to be the ultimate driver of your choices. When you let your feelings be the most powerful force in making choices, you have surrendered your freewill. 

God wants a friendship with you based on your choices, not just on your feelings. God wants us to talk with him, listen to him, work with him, enjoy his Creation with him, and so on. God wants you to trust him, have faith in his capabilities, believe in his promises, and love him back. God wants you to care about what he cares about, to get angry about what angers him, to delight in what delights him.

God is very interested in you, and he wants you to be interested in him. That's how friendships work. And those are all choices that we can make - not just because of how we feel, but more so because of what we know to be good and right.

What can you do to enjoy your friendship with God? What feelings do you have towards God that are souring your relationship with God? What are some good choices you know God wants you to make even though you don't feel like it?

Day Eleven: Becoming Best Friends with God

What hit home for you in the reading today?

The basics of a friendship are this: someone you enjoy talking to and listening to, and they enjoy talking to you, and listening to you. I suppose a best friend is that person whom you enjoy talking to and listening to more than anyone else.

To be close to God, then, means that he's someone we really enjoy talking to and listening to. To be close also includes having shared experiences together, the memories of which continue to fuel the close relationship. Talking and listening are an experience that helps bring a relationships closer, but going through celebrations and trials, through tasks and assignments together playing and planning together are also key experiences.

Jesus said, "I no longer call you servants, because a servant does not know his master's business. Instead, I have called you friends, for everything that I learned from my Father I have made known to you."

To become best friends with God, we need to start on the conversational piece. If we approach God without any desire to build a relationship with him, we'll miss out on much of the conversation. We'll reveal that we just want God to do stuff for us, not really be a friend to him.

Granted, it's a little harder to be friends with someone you can't see, you can't punch in the arm, you can't hear on the phone, you can't sip coffee with. But then God isn't quite like all our other friends. If we just start with talking AND listening with God, we'll make good progress in our friendship.

There were some good reminders for me in this chapter about friendship with God:

You can carry on a continuous, open-ended conversation with him throughout the day, talking with him about whatever you are doing or thinking at that moment. "Praying without ceasing" means conversing with God while shopping, driving, working, or performing any other everyday tasks.

The key to friendship with God, [Brother Lawrence] said, is not changing what you do, but changing your attitude toward what you do. What you normally do for yourself you begin doing for God, whether it is eating, bathing, working, relaxing, or taking out the trash.

It's helpful to keep the idea of friendship in your mind when talking with God - keep the prayers short, make them to the point, be direct. Some of you don't pray more because you just don't know what to say.  A good place to start is to pray a short piece of Scripture that captures the essence of what you want God to know or do.

For example, you could repeat in your mind (or out loud): "Lord, have mercy"; or "Lord, help me believe"; or "Lord, your will be done"; or "Lord, give us today our daily bread"; or "Lord, thank you" or you can come up with many, many other short prayers.

Here's one of the best suggestions of the chapter - especially for those of you who worry a lot, who are burdened with anxiety and fear:

When you think about a problem over and over in your mind, that's called worry. When you think about God's Word over and over in your mind, that's meditation. If you know how to worry, you already know how to meditate! You just need to switch your attention from your problems to Bible verses. The more you meditate on God's Word, the less you will have to worry about.